1. Must be a truly dedicated Christian. He must love God with all his heart, soul, and mind. God has to be number in his life; so that, I will not engulf too much of his life. That way I know the relationship will stay where it's supposed to be when its supposed to be. And as long as we both follow what God is telling us to do, our relationship will go exactly according to God's plan, which is the only plan I have any interest in following. That will make sure the relationship has balance.
2. Able to give Godly advice. Although I'm dedicated to God I do mess up...many many times, and I'm going to need a man who can and will correct me when he sees me straying from a Godly path, and then help keep me on the right path. Kind of like an accountability partner for life. He needs to be wise in the ways of God, and is able to resist the temptations of the world.
3. Is a virgin. If he is truly a Godly Christian he would be a virgin; he would understand how sacred his virginity really is. But he may not have always been that way; therefore, if he is not a virgin but has changed life and doesn't act that way anymore, then all would be completely forgiven and forgotten.
4. Has his own moral standards. I want him to have his own Biblical moral standards that he always follows because he believes them himself, and not just because of me. But because he believes them in his own heart he should also be able to completely defend his beliefs to himself, me, and anyone else. I don't want him to change just for me, just so that I will love him, but because he needs to and God calls him to better himself.
5. Is willing to defend his beliefs when necessary. Now I don't want someone who will start conflicts or disagreements or things like that, but I want someone who knows what he believes and when someone challenges that (if it is important enough) he can and will defend it with all his knowledge and wisdom.
6. Is able to agree on one church. If we don't already go to the same church we must agree on one for each other (and in the future, for our family) because its important for us to be learning about God and growing towards him together not separately. A couple that prays together stays together. (haha)
Personality/Character
1. Have respect for a woman's body. He can't be so rapped up in how hot he thinks I am that he pays no attention to anything else about me. First and foremost he needs to love me for who I am not what I look like.
2. A good listener. Someone who will be willing to sacrifice his own time to just sit there and listen to me if I've had a bad day and need to talk about it. Or if I'm feeling really mad or sad or whatever, and just need to vent to him. He is just willing to sit there for however long I need, to just talk with me or talk to me or just listen to me, whatever I need.
3. A kind person. He should be the kind of person who isn't judgmental towards people, he is friendly with everyone. He's easy to get along with, a personable person. Someone I can feel very comfortable around, and someone who's easy to talk to, easy to relate with.
4. A compassionate and thoughtful person. I'd like him to be the kind of person who will be observant of me and notice when I am sad or lonely or mad and do things for to cheer me up and make me feel better. I'd want him to be the kind of person who will do things for me just because; just because he loves me, just because he was thinking about me, etc.
5. An optimistic person and slow to anger. He should be the kind of person who likes to find the best in a situation, a person, or something. Quick to point out the positives, and to encourage and comfort, and be more supportive. Oh, and definitely he needs to be slow to anger, because (although I try not to) many times I am quick to get upset, or frustrated, and annoyed, and I need him to be able to handle that or calm down the situation. To be able to counteract the situation and help me realize I don't need to get worked up about something. Someone who will be patient with me, and understand my flaws and be willing to work with them.
6. Is a determined person. He should be someone who doesn't give up on things easily, that when he has a goal he goes after it unfailing. He doesn't let frivolous, minor things distract him from his goals. And he will do what's necessary to get what he wants and where he wants to go (as long as God approves of his goal and his methods).
7. Intelligent. I want someone who is smart and educated. Not someone who believes ignorance is bliss, but makes an effort to be informed about the things going on in our world today. And someone who is opinionated where it matters and can defend his opinions well. He doesn't have to be a genius and know everything about everything or anything, but at least someone who will make an effort to be educated in the important issues to a Christian, and is able to discern the good from the evils of the world.
8. Should be able to be spontaneous and fun. I want someone who will be willing to do stuff spontaneously, someone who is not tied down to the restrictions of a schedule can be crazy and fun like me .
9. Funny. Someone who knows me and knows how to make me laugh at any time. Who whenever I'm with him it doesn't matter what we're doing, I'll always be having fun and smiling as long as I'm with him.
10. Can be fun and serious. Someone who knows when to make jokes and when to be serious. He can tell when I'm in a laughing and joking me and can play off that, but can also see when I'm not in the mood to be funny and is sensitive to that.
Relational Aspects
1. Is accepted by my family and friends. If I'm going to spend the rest of my life with him then he should be able to get along with my family and friends (at least my Christian friends). Because if everyone I know disapproves of him and doesn't like him then that's probably a sign that he's not the right guy for me.
2. Someone who really cares about me. Someone who will care enough about me to get to know me and be able to understand me like no one else can. If I'm emotional or feeling something that most people wouldn't understand, but he understands exactly what I'm feeling and is able to help me and make me feel better. Someone who knows exactly what to do to cheer me up, who can predict what I'm going to need before I say it. Someone who knows me better than I know myself sometimes, and is sensitive to my feelings.
3. I am the most important thing in his life (besides God). He should always put me second (after God) and not let his work or anything else come before me. He love every part of me (even the imperfect parts) because it's the way God made me, and God made us for each other. That he won't be disappointed with me if parts of me aren't as good as he hoped they would.
4. Someone who wants me more than anyone else. I want a man who will love me so much that he doesn't care about any other woman in the world. Even if he could have someone who is prettier than me, smarter than me, nicer than me, or whatever he wouldn't. Because to him I'm the best there is, and he loves me just the way I am.
5. Knows a relationship is based on trust. He knows that we have to be able to tell each other the truth no matter what it is. That if he has done something wrong or bad then he can tell me. That he trusts me that I will be understanding and judge the situation appropriately and wont get mad at him unnecessarily.
6. Is protective of me. I want someone who is a little possessive of me; if he sees someone hitting on me or someone being inappropriate with me he will protect me and my honor (if that's not too corny). And he would never let anything or anyone hurt me.
7. Willing to share the work and effort. Someone who doesn't think that I should be the one doing all the work and someone who doesn't take on all the work himself. Because a relationship is made by give and take, and we both need to be willing to do both. And this can apply to any area of the relationship.
8. Is supportive of my goals. I want someone who knows what I want to do and be and is supportive of me. Someone who will encourage me to be my best and do my best and reach everything that I ever wanted and to do it all for God.
9. Is able to hold a conversation. He can talk to me and with me well. When I ask him things its not like pulling teeth or harder then brain surgery for him to respond to me. And he is actually intriguing and engaging. We have a connection where we can talk for hours and not get tired of each others voices. He has interesting conversation and knows how to talk to me best.
10. Be able to handle my Quirky personality. I'm a very spontaneous, crazy at times, random, and maybe even slightly strange person. And I want someone who knows all these things and is ok with them and have with me and the things I like to do.
11. Is willing to do things with me and for me. Even though he may not particularly want to or like to he's willing to do things with me just because he knows I want him to or I want him to be there with me. And if I need him to do something for me he's ok with that because he loves me.
12. Is attractive. I'm not saying you have to be an Orlando Bloom, or a Brad Pitt, or a Justin Timberlake, but I think its reasonable for me to be attracted to him I have a wide variety of the kind of people I'm attracted (looks-wise) so he probably will have a good chance. But in the overall package, looks is truly the last thing I consider because it is the least important in reality.
Thanks for reading
Sincerely,
~MyEssence~
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